Nikia Chaney
going to
going to spell h.o.m.e. like koolaid red and slippery but not
pulsing or heart in palm or the rat tat
of flesh against wall but k o o then sugar so thick
it vibrates your teeth like home like rosè or rosie a thing
my dirt skin can never be because it don't need to be and home
is even wrong four letters the o sound a short horn
that puffs it way past the door to close off the wind when it
should be long an ahh an uh even e slow as the slide of thick
glass to waiting red water splash flittering round the handle and
that's the word right there the knob in knuckles the cold in palm and
the drink hugging and stroking the back of your neck
like fingers so thirsty for touch they only taste you best
wipe off your mouth i want that i got that going on I take that
and write it out in wet letters across the porch like an effigy fat
hereness in my mouth
openness in my neck cause if i don't then what's
pulsing or heart in palm or the rat tat
of flesh against wall but k o o then sugar so thick
it vibrates your teeth like home like rosè or rosie a thing
my dirt skin can never be because it don't need to be and home
is even wrong four letters the o sound a short horn
that puffs it way past the door to close off the wind when it
should be long an ahh an uh even e slow as the slide of thick
glass to waiting red water splash flittering round the handle and
that's the word right there the knob in knuckles the cold in palm and
the drink hugging and stroking the back of your neck
like fingers so thirsty for touch they only taste you best
wipe off your mouth i want that i got that going on I take that
and write it out in wet letters across the porch like an effigy fat
hereness in my mouth
openness in my neck cause if i don't then what's
the use of sweet drinks and holding on what's
the real reason for relief that pitcher on the wall
shining open saying thirsty girl you thirsty yes close the door
or open it and walk through you belong here
you arrived set it down
drink it
sleep
drink it
sleep
but her (again)
but her — (again) tell her that she has no arms — no want — rather her ripples of math unfold
rapidly to cover the clear confidence of her impossibility — there ain’t a weaning here — nor loss
rapidly to cover the clear confidence of her impossibility — there ain’t a weaning here — nor loss
of appetite — unzip her ribs and step over each one of her clay steins — scuffle with the patches
of her struggling — her small defeats — the reach around she leaves hanging on the bed to flutter
with the added finespun to her levees — the unmade sheet — the post about cornrows and
blankets — her nails just long enough to curve round the knots and margins to pretend that
with the added finespun to her levees — the unmade sheet — the post about cornrows and
blankets — her nails just long enough to curve round the knots and margins to pretend that
this façade is not wanting her back — make her thirsty — make her braided fancy — recite to her
the news of the revolution humming so glitzy in the want of it you both start to swoon — sing it
then and feed her arms and candy to untwist each strand of her with your whole body like
you really are a silhouette of shea butter and she cannot sprout alone just laying there — make
then and feed her arms and candy to untwist each strand of her with your whole body like
you really are a silhouette of shea butter and she cannot sprout alone just laying there — make
her add up — one piece slowly unraveled to one flash via the sob and shake (i.e) the cushions on
the couch under her spine — she is joining in slowly she is smiley and queued, a being of touch
plaited — come — come you — come here you — and define wage war — calculate her — then knock
her down — the breastbone like so much silky dust caught in the room’s quiet breeze — the relief
plaited — come — come you — come here you — and define wage war — calculate her — then knock
her down — the breastbone like so much silky dust caught in the room’s quiet breeze — the relief
& sometimes I don’t even like
& sometimes I don’t even like the little boy
those skinny arms and needy ways of
those skinny arms and needy ways of
a sunken chest in a grown out fade
“I choke these fools” @10 years old and
desperate so desperate to stay over at my house a
desperate so desperate to stay over at my house a
little longer he falls asleep in the backseat as
I pass men at the metal doors grass too broke
I pass men at the metal doors grass too broke
to grow in all this blot plate of brick boxes the housing
authority deigned to maintain a kind
authority deigned to maintain a kind
of service and corrective aid callous barbs
that beg thank you because hey it's not a bench
that beg thank you because hey it's not a bench
or a shelter or the laid down passenger
seat of a car and now his mother on the phone
seat of a car and now his mother on the phone
spelling out e.v.i.c.t. . . because of trouble @ her
house now with that other authority though she has two
house now with that other authority though she has two
children two part time jobs two crumbling left feet
back bent @31 where if I could I
back bent @31 where if I could I
would take her in my home
and this time sequester
and this time sequester
her straighten her out with cool irons
and zumba and pottery or alvin ailey cause couldn’t she dance
and zumba and pottery or alvin ailey cause couldn’t she dance
at one time @17 wasn’t there butterflies and didn’t
we bond those years ago over the ways
we bond those years ago over the ways
a body can stretch and move out away from everything
its ever known but she says
its ever known but she says
no it is too late for that the three day notice already
came and there is no time left but to go back home
came and there is no time left but to go back home
now time to go home now wake up now baby its time
to go home and just try to sleep lay down
to go home and just try to sleep lay down
and sleep try anyway don't be sad
I promise to take you swimming again
I promise to take you swimming again
next weekend.
being
& being as they
assume the woman
part is underbelly doughy fluid filled
sacs of little tiny mewling things pappy
structure bound by echo you’d think
assume the woman
part is underbelly doughy fluid filled
sacs of little tiny mewling things pappy
structure bound by echo you’d think
that she’d sleep here sheets with crumbs
all her limbs stretched
out to the doorway
or else tucked under
steel burka bars and of course shuddering
all her limbs stretched
out to the doorway
or else tucked under
steel burka bars and of course shuddering
yet the lining of her
silhouette peers
over the tossed city like sunrise there are
spears here and twine
in each of her fists
and she is awake ready to quake down
on that body the silence
before the throw
silhouette peers
over the tossed city like sunrise there are
spears here and twine
in each of her fists
and she is awake ready to quake down
on that body the silence
before the throw
I thought the boy inside would drive me
gift me his shield chestwood curse word
stratified between the folds
hoard and army
enough to make plates of this
labor a wassail
of servantless muster
gift me his shield chestwood curse word
stratified between the folds
hoard and army
enough to make plates of this
labor a wassail
of servantless muster
and she got down
in the kitchen like it wasn’t nothing mended our feet
and showed him all up
in the kitchen like it wasn’t nothing mended our feet
and showed him all up
a monster
A monster seas through the twilight slosh to pluck
the small figures by their midriffs skywards
the small figures by their midriffs skywards
to unlock a promise
of lightning cleansing a radiation rainblessed with all
that spit tumbling
out dripping salt all gold all steam
of lightning cleansing a radiation rainblessed with all
that spit tumbling
out dripping salt all gold all steam
this monster’s need so blind in the sound
track of the forgetfulness slumber the way windows should
track of the forgetfulness slumber the way windows should
stretch their piercing seams out
to eat ocean
your voice
saying back your words or mama’s in your own way each syllable
splashing
on the toasted wet rock the press
to eat ocean
your voice
saying back your words or mama’s in your own way each syllable
splashing
on the toasted wet rock the press
of being known on the shoulder the legs bowed in the small thunder
of standing
of standing
or the name of water
when
The monster turns flesh colored and warm to ruckled origami gogira angry prehistoric bent
thing
the breaking down of self for if a body
is used too wrongly or feared or left too long to rot unseen then it
might it ought it not it too
rise in the furor to gather all
the parishioners colleagues from their fleeing
The monster turns flesh colored and warm to ruckled origami gogira angry prehistoric bent
thing
the breaking down of self for if a body
is used too wrongly or feared or left too long to rot unseen then it
might it ought it not it too
rise in the furor to gather all
the parishioners colleagues from their fleeing
to open its mouth dangle them in front of its own black twisting tongue
to hem and stamp and storm
and say well at least think
politely
to hem and stamp and storm
and say well at least think
politely
you know it offends me that you still can’t pronounce my name
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