Vivian Kao
from ANC075: Dear Mrs. River-Dragon
Asianopolis
When I first move to Flint, my house is
sandwiched between the two other Asians in the city:
the old Thai woman and the half Japanese man.
Together with my very small half Chinese son,
we are three.
sandwiched between the two other Asians in the city:
the old Thai woman and the half Japanese man.
Together with my very small half Chinese son,
we are three.
A downright Asian invasion, the neighbor across the street says.
The Jews moved out, and you all moved in.
He laughs. I laugh because he wants me to.
The Jews moved out, and you all moved in.
He laughs. I laugh because he wants me to.
The old Thai woman
is married to a Vietnam War veteran.
He went to Asia to protect American freedom
from the red peril posed by yellow people.
He has palsy and lake blue eyes.
(But did they not look like your wife's brothers?)
is married to a Vietnam War veteran.
He went to Asia to protect American freedom
from the red peril posed by yellow people.
He has palsy and lake blue eyes.
(But did they not look like your wife's brothers?)
He invites me into his home, which he has
turned into a museum of Asian artifacts.
Golden buddhas, sitting and prone,
lacquered bowls, teak tables.
He has painted the lintels red and yellow.
Maybe this is what he owes history,
a burden he bears in the most civilized manner,
not a weight but a hobby.
turned into a museum of Asian artifacts.
Golden buddhas, sitting and prone,
lacquered bowls, teak tables.
He has painted the lintels red and yellow.
Maybe this is what he owes history,
a burden he bears in the most civilized manner,
not a weight but a hobby.
He keeps an immaculate yard, catches
the beech tree's shed leaves before they hit the ground.
Nature's missiles intercepted, neutralized by paper lawn bags.
He shows me the proper use of hedge trimmers.
He is never without a kind greeting to me
or a hello, young man to my very small son.
the beech tree's shed leaves before they hit the ground.
Nature's missiles intercepted, neutralized by paper lawn bags.
He shows me the proper use of hedge trimmers.
He is never without a kind greeting to me
or a hello, young man to my very small son.
His wife cooks me the spiciest curry.
My tongue is numb. My nostrils redolent.
Every fragrance and saltyspicysweetsourumami
stewed and simmered into a Corningware offering.
So this is how she does it in this
cold, grey, flat space they call a land
thousands of miles from home.
My tongue is numb. My nostrils redolent.
Every fragrance and saltyspicysweetsourumami
stewed and simmered into a Corningware offering.
So this is how she does it in this
cold, grey, flat space they call a land
thousands of miles from home.
I can barely follow her English.
She says when she sees me with my very small son,
This you baby? My baby fifty.
I have never seen her baby
but she visits him weekly,
brings him food.
She says when she sees me with my very small son,
This you baby? My baby fifty.
I have never seen her baby
but she visits him weekly,
brings him food.
I realize it must be because I can't cook
that I feel so distant from my husband and son
even though we follow each other's English just fine.
And I realize I can't cook because I have no homeland
whose tastes and smells I must bring into being
before my heart breaks.
that I feel so distant from my husband and son
even though we follow each other's English just fine.
And I realize I can't cook because I have no homeland
whose tastes and smells I must bring into being
before my heart breaks.
Years later, after she and her husband have moved away,
I hear from the expert on the movements
of Jews and Asians
that she died, leaving her husband
to eat rice alone.
I always thought he'd go first.
I hear from the expert on the movements
of Jews and Asians
that she died, leaving her husband
to eat rice alone.
I always thought he'd go first.
I imagine the shape their love must have taken
in the last few weeks, how he must have
held her hand (though I never saw him do it)
and stroked her forehead (though he never
addressed her when other people were around)
and told her she was the meaning and purpose
of his life (but he must have).
in the last few weeks, how he must have
held her hand (though I never saw him do it)
and stroked her forehead (though he never
addressed her when other people were around)
and told her she was the meaning and purpose
of his life (but he must have).
This year,
I meet a Korean American man and
a Chinese woman,
both younger than me,
both trailing kids circling the ages of my own.
Our numbers grow in this town by
one hundred and fifty percent.
I meet a Korean American man and
a Chinese woman,
both younger than me,
both trailing kids circling the ages of my own.
Our numbers grow in this town by
one hundred and fifty percent.
I feel the need to talk to them,
to get to know them better,
but I don't know what to say.
Birds of a feather only because we happened
to rest on the same branch.
Still, I walk my sons to the park
under a canopy of red and yellow leaves
and hope to see them when we get there.
to get to know them better,
but I don't know what to say.
Birds of a feather only because we happened
to rest on the same branch.
Still, I walk my sons to the park
under a canopy of red and yellow leaves
and hope to see them when we get there.
Dear Mrs. River-Dragon
On days when the river tide is low,
and I am out in the kayak with my sons,
I see your iron spine
sticking out of the riverbed,
vertebrae rising in undulating curves,
folding over ripples of shimmering water,
submerging once again under
the factory floor.
and I am out in the kayak with my sons,
I see your iron spine
sticking out of the riverbed,
vertebrae rising in undulating curves,
folding over ripples of shimmering water,
submerging once again under
the factory floor.
Rusted from decades of exposure
to the gods of sky and cloud,
your red bone, uncomplaining,
waited as the waters changed direction
and covered you, a secret from the sun.
to the gods of sky and cloud,
your red bone, uncomplaining,
waited as the waters changed direction
and covered you, a secret from the sun.
You tunnel through the heart of the city
undetected, until boaters, floaters, swimmers
finally look down and see their history:
jagged and rent, twisted and decayed,
disappeared by the captains of industry who
stroked your scales long ago and said goodbye.
undetected, until boaters, floaters, swimmers
finally look down and see their history:
jagged and rent, twisted and decayed,
disappeared by the captains of industry who
stroked your scales long ago and said goodbye.
You stayed here, with the people,
with the have-nots and the never-hads,
with the had-and-losts, with the will-always-need.
with the have-nots and the never-hads,
with the had-and-losts, with the will-always-need.
The boys wrinkle their noses at you:
what's that down there?
The river-dragon, I tell them.
The ancestor of this city who was sent from our own
ancestors to keep and protect us.
Whatever, Mom.
The remains of one past is proof of another—
another one longer, so very much longer.
And no one knows but us.
It's hot. I'm tired. Hungry.
what's that down there?
The river-dragon, I tell them.
The ancestor of this city who was sent from our own
ancestors to keep and protect us.
Whatever, Mom.
The remains of one past is proof of another—
another one longer, so very much longer.
And no one knows but us.
It's hot. I'm tired. Hungry.
Don't touch her, I say,
not because I'm afraid you'll hurt them
but because your power is so boundless that
even your love sometimes feels like it harms.
You are to be respected, not disturbed.
not because I'm afraid you'll hurt them
but because your power is so boundless that
even your love sometimes feels like it harms.
You are to be respected, not disturbed.
The boys think you're opening your jaws to eat us up,
as you've swallowed the remains
of vehicles, shopping carts, debris of all sorts,
dead bodies maybe.
But these are not your victims,
they are ours. Leftovers of capital with
nowhere to go but back into the body
of time, absorbed into the maw
of the ages before ages.
as you've swallowed the remains
of vehicles, shopping carts, debris of all sorts,
dead bodies maybe.
But these are not your victims,
they are ours. Leftovers of capital with
nowhere to go but back into the body
of time, absorbed into the maw
of the ages before ages.
Before East and West, man and woman,
water and not.
water and not.
Many find it strange to see me here.
My skin, my eyes, my face, my hair—
we are not from this flatland so far
from the sea; so far from the tea grown on the
mountainside, from the pineapple plantations
and the old fishermen: a land of green
hills I have seen only once but forgot as
I aged. But as you are inexplicably here,
so am I. They have sent you to me,
the Gaos and Leis and Yus and Chens
from the long ago before long ago.
My skin, my eyes, my face, my hair—
we are not from this flatland so far
from the sea; so far from the tea grown on the
mountainside, from the pineapple plantations
and the old fishermen: a land of green
hills I have seen only once but forgot as
I aged. But as you are inexplicably here,
so am I. They have sent you to me,
the Gaos and Leis and Yus and Chens
from the long ago before long ago.
And so I know
that while this place does not claim me,
it is here that I belong.
that while this place does not claim me,
it is here that I belong.
